just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
