No, you can still breathe under the balls.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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