Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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