I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
