Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
