i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Randomize
