Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
