the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
you will always have a special place in my vag
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
