I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
I know her cup size but not her name....
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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