38 yer olds are good kisserssss
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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