dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I puked a lego.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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