a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
