yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Randomize
