This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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