she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize