so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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