how can u be prego again
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize