I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
