3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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