Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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