i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
