Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize