I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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