Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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