he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
