whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
