So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize