Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
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