she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
