looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
