1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
