i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
you will always have a special place in my vag
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Randomize