Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
