some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
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