I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
