i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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