So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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