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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....

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• (425): View more from Washington

  I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.

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• (256): View more from Alabama

  Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.

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• (504): View more from Louisiana

  All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.

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• (708): View more from Illinois

  Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.

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• (254): View more from Texas

  I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk

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• (740): View more from Ohio

  Sorry about my life...

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• (917): View more from New York City

  Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.

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• (858): View more from California

  My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.

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• (646): View more from New York

  The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job

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