How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
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