So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize