i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize
