I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
