butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
