Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.

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(516): View more from New York

How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.

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(904): View more from Florida

Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

that's how you measure success

(1-401): View more from Rhode Island

By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?

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(775): View more from Nevada

If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.

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(817): View more from Texas

Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.

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(616): View more from Michigan

She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.

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