Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I understand Curling. That high.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Randomize
