Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
