hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
well you can't waste a boner
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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