her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
did i walk over a car last night?
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I think we might need a safe word for this...
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