bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
