this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Randomize
