my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Randomize
