hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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