So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Randomize