he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
