There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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