it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I have fence marks all over my body
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
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